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    "text": "I come running up behind you.\n\n\"Hold up.\"\n\nYou feel a hand pat your buttcheek.\n\n\"There was a Black Widow on you.\"\n\nYour life is saved.\n\n\"Ope!\"\n\nA pat on your other cheek.\n\n\"Another one.\"\n\nHeroic.\n\n\"Whoa!\"\n\nYour cheeks clap + ripple under a hail of blows.\n\n\"Dude, there are SO many spiders back here.\"",
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